Leo Tolstoy said, "If you want to be happy, be". I believe the same is true for love. If you want to be love, be.
So often we think about love for others. We think about the feeling when we are in love. We seldom take the time to imagine how the world would be if we are love.
If we are to become love we have to lose our self in love. There is no space for pride.
The next time you feel triggered, attacked or things aren't going your way, pause for a moment and be love.
I believe when you do, God's entire Universe will conspire to work the situation for your good.
To boast is to have a source of pride. To pat oneself on the back. To gloat. To blow one's own horn.
There is a lesson in Marianne Williamson's "A Course in Miracles" that says when someone attacks you and you feel triggered, that is the moment to be still or "in my defenselessness, my safety lies".
Over the past few months, there have been numerous things to happen that I had to practice this defenselessness approach. Instead of reacting, I would be still, and let the Universe do what It needed to do.
Then recently, I found myself bringing up the very things I had chosen not to get defensive about in the first place. This time around I was bringing them up not in a confrontational manner, but I would say things that I knew as to say "aha...betcha didn't know I knew that".
I found myself boasting.
This was not intentional. Reflecting on the situation I can remember feeling like I was strong for not blowing up at the time. Now that I think about it, bringing it up later and feeling like I had accomplished something by not blowing up about it is just as bad.
So, I am still practicing the kind of love that does not boast. Once again, it requires us to return to humility. Even when I didn't think what I was doing was being proud, when I look back on it, I was. That's that.
I'm learning this love thing takes a constant renewal of your mind, your spirit and your intentions.
As a believer, I have stood and confessed many times that what God has for me, is only for me. I've been so positive that everything in my life is working out the way it should. I've put on the outward appearance so many times that my life is exactly where it is supposed to be. It is.
At the same time, I haven't perfected the characteristic of this kind of love. Especially when something or someone you love is being shared, it is extremely difficult, I would say near impossible if it wasn't written in the Bible that love does not do this.
Envy. The word itself does not sound good. It causes us to turn our eyes and our focus away from what God has blessed us with and causes us to feel inadequate, insufficient and unloved.
That is why love does not envy. Love desires what it has - what it is. In essence, love is enough.
Love is kind. Love cares more for others than for self. Love is...
Kind.
I'm sitting down to write this after coming off of a 3 hour meltdown with my son (we are experiencing an early onset of the terrible twos). So, I have been practicing patient love for the past 3 hours.
Kind.
Love is....
Admittedly, I can deal with the many translations that say "love is kind". When I look at the translation in The Message Bible, it makes this characteristic of love a bit more difficult to digest.
"Love cares more for others than for self".
How does that translate to being kind? In our many different human relationships, it is easy to believe we are kind, but when we look at it from the context of caring more for others than for self, it's not so easy anymore. How do you care more for someone than for yourself when that other person has misused you? How do you continue to practice a kind love when the person just doesn't seem deserving?
Ask Jesus. He did it and continues to do it today. It's called loving from a distance. Humility is difficult to have. Especially when it means that you must love someone in spite of all they have done.
I can relate today's characteristic to many relationships in my life. It is so easy when disagreements occur to see fault in the other person. Today's love that we are talking about seeks to see the best in the other person, and causes us to self examine more.
Together, love endures long and is patient and kind. Practice caring more for others today. Practice being patient today. Endure.
Freedictionary.com gives the following definition:
pa·tient(pshnt)adj.
1. Bearing or enduring pain, difficulty, provocation, or annoyance with calmness.
2. Marked by or exhibiting calm endurance of pain, difficulty, provocation, or annoyance.
3. Tolerant; understanding: an unfailingly patient leader and guide.
4. Persevering; constant: With patient industry, she revived the failing business and made it thrive.
5. Capable of calmly awaiting an outcome or result; not hasty or impulsive.
6. Capable of bearing or enduring pain, difficulty, provocation, or annoyance
To me, none of these definitions sound fun. Really, they don't sound desirable at all. The first characteristic of love in this song is patience, making one thing clear: Patience = Endurance. The race of love is not easy. We are commanded to love those who have done us wrong, to love our enemies, and to first, above all else, be patient.
The word patience is found 33 times in the King James Version of the Bible. Obviously, God wants us to learn something about being patient. Being patient is hard, so does that make loving hard?
The Message Bible puts the phrase "love is patient" a different way. It says:
"Love never gives up"
So how do we endure, how do we practice patience, how do we not give up when everything around us says we should? We must turn it over to God. To Him who has all power in His Hands and who practices patient love for us every single day.
I'll be the first to admit that there are people I love dearly in my life that I sincerely don't want to be patient with. I want them to change right at this moment. I have often tried to love them so hard to try to change them. I always come back to the same conclusion; only by practicing patient love for them, and allowing God to work the miracle, can real change in a person's life happen.
So take this first characteristic seriously. Can you love someone even when you don't like who they are at the moment? Can you love someone when everything they've done to you should have broken you? Patient love does. Patient love says even though I don't like the things you've done and the things you are doing, I love you still.
After venting last week about how much I feel my love is returning void, I decided it would help my spirit to talk about what love is. So, I'm introducing a new blog series entitled - Love is... In this series, I'll take a look at the 15 characteristics of love laid out in 1 Corinthians 13. I don't know where this series is going to lead me, or what it will reveal, but I am excited for the journey.
"Love makes your soul crawl out from its hiding place." - Zora Neale Hurston
This is today's meditation from thedailybibleverse.org. It felt really good to my soul so I had to share here.
Exodus 20:1-3 – You shall have no other gods before Me
And God spoke all these words: I am the LORD your God, who brought you out of Egypt, out of the land of slavery. You shall have no other gods before me. – Exodus 20:1-3 (NIV)
The first of the 10 Commandments is “I am the LORD your God…you shall have no other gods before me.” If we truly believe and live out this first commandment, it will keep us from breaking any of the remaining nine! This is because if we keep God first in our life, above everything else, he himself will actually make us righteous before him. He is the LORD-I AM that I AM. He is the ultimate reality of life, love and power. When we believe this and submit our lives to him, we’ll not be led astray by other “gods” of this world or the “gods” of our flesh that would seek to destroy us. God desires to bring us out of a land of slavery to sin and self, and under his loving rule in all areas of our lives. Living out this first command truly will fulfill all the rest!
Note: In the days that follow, we will look more closely at each of the 10 Commandments and how obedience to the 1st Commandment is the fulfillment of all the rest.
Today’s Commentary by: Caesar Kalinowski, Pastor, Soma Communities
Last night, I went to see Tyler Perry's Why Did I Get Married Too. I'm a fan of TP movies, so I'll be adding this to the list. Throughout the movie one message prevailed: marriages go through trouble, but with enough love and commitment, you can make it through.
Turn the page. I went to see this movie with my husband, who I've been separated from for the past 7 months. My husband who has one foot out the door and the other halfway in divorce court. So I'm watching this movie thinking "is there any reality here?"
I HATE divorce. I HATE what it is doing to our marriage. I HATE what it is doing to our family. I HATE IT. It's also caused me to wonder why. Why does my marriage have to be the one that seems beyond repair? Why does God allow me to go through this and endure so much pain? Why did I get married?
Love. In the movie there's a line: "love will not return to you void". Well it sure feels like it. I love my husband. In his greatness, in his weakness, through all his shit, I love him. But I'm not stupid. My love has been returning void. I don't care what you say. So after the movie I allowed myself to shed a tear publicly because I am tired.
I'm tired of being strong. I'm tired. I'm tired of having examples of healthy marriages all around me and yet mine is crumbling right before my eyes. I'm tired.
I've been experiencing a lot of deep emotions lately. Everything going on in our society right now seems to have an affect on me. I am more aware of the political division in our country now more than ever, and the tension that it has caused has an affect on me. One thing that particularly gets to me, is that our division over political issues has turned into a division over religious issues. By some, the Gates of Heaven will surely be closed to me because I don't want the government telling a woman what to do with her body, I don't particularly care for the government to tell people who should marry and I really don't want the government going to countries and killing innocent people in the name of a "war on terrorism".
I've always thought that we could better support our communities by getting to the root of any social issue versus radically opposing it. Wouldn't it make more sense to spend our time working with teen girls, spending time with women from different walks of life, in order to be the salt of the world, versus standing in front of Planned Parenthood with signs calling women baby killers? At that point, I think it is too late.
Whether you agree with my political views or not, and whether you think because of my political views I'm not the "real kind" of Christian you think I should be, there is one thing I know for sure on this Good Friday. When Jesus hung on that cross, He took:
abortion there with Him too. So instead of condemning those who are pro-choice, I choose to see it from Jesus' eyes - forgiven.
same-sex marriage. So instead of condemning those who believe in same-sex marriage, I choose to see it from Jesus' eyes - forgiven.
And any other political issues that we as a Christian society want to condemn as being sinful - Jesus took it all to the Cross with Him. So instead of judging others for what you consider the most damning sins - remember a sin is a sin, and Jesus already said - FORGIVEN.
I actually wrote this piece in 2007, but I was just thinking about it today and had to share it again. God allows us to go through seasons in our life in order for His will to be done. We don't like it, it's not comfortable, but it is absolutely necessary for His purpose in our lives to be fulfilled. When I get so caught up in my circumstances and lose sight of what God has already promised, I'm reminded that if Jesus had to endure being betrayed and that was God's only Son, then of course I'm going to have to endure some things - even betrayal by those I love dearly. Because of this understanding, I can now say I can rejoice in and through my trials, because I know I'm advancing towards His purpose. Amen.
Matthew 26:48 -54
Now the betrayer had arranged a signal with them: "The one I kiss is the man; arrest him." Going at once to Jesus, Judas said, "Greetings, Rabbi!" and kissed him.
Jesus replied, "Friend, do what you came for."
Then the men stepped forward, seized Jesus and arrested him. With that, one of Jesus' companions reached for his sword, drew it out and struck the servant of the high priest, cutting off his ear.
"Put your sword back in its place," Jesus said to him, "for all who draw the sword will die by the sword. Do you think I cannot call on my Father, and he will at once put at my disposal more than twelve legions of angels? But how then would the Scriptures be fulfilled that say it must happen in this way?"
Let's think about it. Peter tried to save Jesus. He was actually trying to stop Jesus from His Divine purpose. Everyone else could have been replaced, but Judas' kiss of betrayal was necessary to fulfill God's purpose. Jesus would have never filled the mandate and purpose of God if Judas hadn't kissed him. After we are betrayed by the kiss of Judas, there is going to be a crucifixion, then there will be a burial, but after the burial is a RESURRECTION!!!
What people don't realize is that our brother's betrayal is advancing us. Phew..this has me right now.
I don't know what you are going through right now. I don't know who in your life has kissed you with the kiss of betrayal. Instead of fighting him, fighting for him, whatever the case may be, just be like Jesus and say "Friend, do what you came for"! Realize that God placed that person in your life for a reason. The hurt, the pain, the struggle, the fight, the tears....it's advancing you to your purpose. They didn't realize the greatness they were releasing in you, but the next time you see your Judas...say thank you, you advanced me to my purpose!!!!
I am a late 20 something mom, entrepreneur and small business owner. I'm so in love with God and crazy about Jesus. I hope to share from my heart so that others may see His light.
Leo Tolstoy said, "If you want to be happy, be". I believe the same is true for love. If you want to be love, be. 
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