Wednesday, March 17, 2010

A Return to Self: The history of my natural hair journey


My natural hair journey actually began in 2006 when my stylist in Delaware, Ebon, encouraged me to stop relaxing my hair. He promised he would take really good care of my hair without relaxing it - so I haven't had a relaxer since September 2006.

With a stylist like Ebon, I used to get my hair done every two weeks and you couldn't even tell I wasn't relaxing it. I would drive from Baltimore to Delaware every other weekend, on a pretty regular basis to get my hair done.

Here are some pictures from that time:



In Spring 2008 when I was six months pregnant, I decided the drive every other weekend was getting to be a bit much. So, I started asking about stylists in Baltimore who knew how to handle natural hair. I didn't want to sit in somebody's chair every other week and hear that I should relax my hair. A co-worker actually introduced me to her stylist, who not only knew how to style natural hair, but had a gorgeous head of natural hair herself. So, in March 2008 I started going to Kim in Owings Mills.

Here are a few photos from that time:


After having Trey, I started wanting to wear my hair curly more often. With a new born baby, it became increasingly difficult to find time to get to the salon, and when I straightened it I just felt like I was going to end up bald headed. So, I started searching for products and ways to style my hair.

Here are some photos from that time:


I had a lot of fun during this time. Whenever I look at these photos I always see a bit of radiance in myself that I don't always see when I'm straightening my hair. I guess I'm most comfortable being in my own skin.

This past summer, I visited Kim and she said my hair was breaking a lot in the back. I'm not sure what that was attributed to, but it most likely was because my hair was lacking the needed moisture. So, I had her trim my hair and started straightening it again. I bought a Red flat-iron, some Chi silk infusion and felt like I could live like this forever.

Here are some pictures from this time:



Pretty good, huh? The reality is, I'm not a hairstylist, so while I may be able to curl it to look good, I wasn't taking good care of it in order to have healthy hair. My dream is to have a head of thick, healthy, natural hair. Every now and then, I get tired of feeding into the stereotype that in order to have pretty hair you have to have long, straight hair. When I feel like that I'll wash my hair and pull it back:



But last week I decided my hair deserves more. So, I visited Kamaria Creations near Old Town, and got two-strand twists professionally done. I love them! I'm setting out to go a year without heat-styling my hair. Protective style for me it is.

Here's a few pictures of the twists:



One week later and my hair has grown like a weed. As a friend on Twitter commented: "happy hair will do that!". Indeed it will. So, I'm so excited, because tomorrow I'm going for my first ever FULL weave. I was concerned because I know nothing about buying hair, and I wasn't sure the hair I ended up getting was going to look good. Then I found this YouTube video discussing the exact hair I bought, and it eased my worries. The only other time I've had a weave was for my wedding, and even then it was just a partial weave to make a full bun.

So, I'll let you know about the weave experience tomorrow!

Until then, I'm enjoying rocking the twist-out:







2 comments:

  1. Girl, I have been natural since November of 2007, and have not looked back. It hasn't been without its struggles, please be clear. I still struggle from time to time with aspects of this natural path I've chosen. Most of my frustration though, has come from finding the right products for my hair! I can't tell you how much money I've spent trying to figure this out! As I speak, I have an entire dresser drawer FULL of hair products. Some used, and some not so used. Also, my curl pattern is mixed. S-curls in the top, kinks on the sides, and ringlets in back and the middle. Argh!! I envy girls with a consistent curl pattern, (or the appearance thereof) no one actually has an entirely even texture/curl pattern. Also, the back of my hair ALWAYS outgrows the sides; this kills me. I have days when I feel sexy and defined, and others when I say "I look like a poodle, my hair is so ugly." It's a process. I've actually gained more acceptance from other cultures about the texture my natural hair than I have my own. The long straight thing I've done since age 17. I'm tired. If I want straight, I'll flat iron, and I can have it. I've done that though, maybe 5 times in the 2 1/2 years I've been natural. Too much heat disturbs my curl pattern, and it's takes a few days/weeks to get back to it's true natural state.

    Going natural has been the most liberating experience in my life. I can't describe it, (but I'm sure you know what I mean) you just have to experience it. I've recently started playing with highlights, and I like the look, but find it straightens my hair as well, so I won't be doing that too often.

    I'm into finding the most natural products I can, without sulfates, alcohols, parabens, silicones, mineral oils, etc. All of which dry natural out. There are many other ingredients as well, but I can't recall them all right now. A website that has been a priceless source of information is www.naturallycurly.com. It's women of all ethnic backgrounds with hair from afro texture to fine caucasian curls sharing their trails and errors, and product and styling suggestions. It help me tremendously during my transition from a perm to being completely natural, and then some! Please know one thing as a natural: Conditioner is your best friend! Rinse out, leave in, and deep conditioner! Use it!

    Here are a few products that are constant staples for me no matter how many different styling agents I try: (and I've tried many!)

    Shampoo: Trader Joe's Tea Tree Shampoo

    Conditioner: Giovanni's Organic Direct Leave-In, Giovanni's Organic Nutrafix Reconstructor, Elucence Moisture Balance, (as a leave in) Herbal Essences Hello Hydration!, (rinse out or leave in).

    Styling Agents: Anything by Kinky Curly. I use Kinky Curly Curling Custard, Carol's Daughter: Some of Margaurites Magic, Fantasia IC Gel with Sparkalites and Aloe.

    Other Styling Agents: These are not so kosher ingredients wise, but if money is tight, they work. FX Curls Up Curl Reactivator and Defrizzant, Ion Curl Solutions Curl Defining Cream, and Garnier Frutis Curl Sculpting Cream-Gel.

    Hope this helps. Remember: Natural Hair Rules!!!

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  2. Thanks so much Kendra. It has been a beautiful journey and trying at times. It is true...most times my co-workers were the ones who were always encouraging me to wear my hair "curly", while my family would be telling me to straighten it. To me something is wrong with that picture. We are teaching our baby girls to not like their natural hair.

    I love Kinky Curly custard and Carol's Daughter Khoret Amen Hair Oil. I've been happy with Organix Cocunut Milk Shampoo and Conditioner, and do an Olive Oil deep condition.

    Thanks for the encouragement. It's good to connect and keep the useful tips coming!

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